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This newspaper is a time machine, locked in around the time of two World Wars, one World Cup and a lost age when it was permissible to poke fun at Germans.
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Spot are These Guys Up To
These adorable snow leopards are set to knock spots off other attractions at Wuppertal Zoo in Germany after getting to grips with their public for the first time.
The youngsters - now three months old - are being raised by hand by keeper Nadine Hess after the tragic death of mum Gulcha six weeks ago.
As the cubs' deputy mum, Nadine makes sure the trio get regular cuddles and play sessions every day as they learn to socialise with each other.
But the youngsters - Aziza, Aditi and Aruna - are already growing up so fast on a diet of raw minced meat that Nadine will soon have to step back.
"They are already quite aggressive. It's still just playing to them, but having a 22 pound animal jumping on your back is quite a challenge," she explained.
Zoo curator Andre Stadler aded: "They need to grow up as far away from people as possible. There should be no human dependencies."
The endangered big cats - with piercing pale blue eyes - are endangered in the wild in Asia, with less 7,000 living across India, China, Russia and Pakistan.
German Herald
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GRIN AND BEAR IT - Brown Bears At The Dentist
With toothache in choppers this size, these brown bears at a German wildlife park had every right to be a bit grizzly.
FORK THAT - Worker turns Fork Lift Into Jousting Lance
German police are investigating after a hyper market worker turned his forklift truck into a jousting device and attempted to spear a fellow worker after a row.
DIRTY THIRTY - Fake Euro Note Warning By Cops
A German corner shop owner saw some of his profits go up in smoke after he accepted payment for a pack of cigarettes with this non-existent 30 Euro note.
MURDER MYSTERY: Did Killer Confess in Novel?
Fugitive Norbert Wieland, 66, has been on the run since his girlfriend Bettina Polzer's body was found at her apartment in Furstenfeldbruck, Germany.
WHITE BLAM MAN - Brit Cheats Death By Seconds in Crane Smash
A British white van man cheated death by seconds in Germany when a falling 130 crane arm cut his truck in half.
UNTRUCKY BREAK: Thief Facing Justice
This smug looking truck thief will soon be facing justice - after speed cameras caught him fleeing the scene in Sarstedt, Germany.
NAZI SHOCK: Death Camp Victims Buried Beside SS Officers
Nazi death camp victims were secretly buried beside SS officers at a German World War II cemetery, outraged historians have revealed.
PICNIC BASKET BABY MURDERED - Baby abandoned in River Danube
A mother whose newborn baby boy was found dead in a picnic hamper with his throat cut is being quizzed by police in Regensburg, Germany.
WE ARE NOT EMU-SED - 7 Police Cars Chase Emu
Heavy handed cops gunned down a six foot tall emu after it escaped from an enclosure in Heimfeld, Germany.
BUNNY SPOILER: Bieber Playmate Demoted
A Playboy bunny girl who met teen sensation Justin Beiber privately at a hotel after a show has been disciplined by bosses in Cologne, Germany.
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