This newspaper is a time machine, locked in around the time of two World Wars, one World Cup and a lost age when it was permissible to poke fun at Germans.
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01. 10. 12. - 15:00
This pet cat used up several of her nine lives after getting stranded in a tree, then on a roof and finally ending up in the ventilation system of a block of flats where she had to be freed by firemen.
Locals at Essen in Germany first spotted the cat named Fleck hanging from the top of the tree – and raised the alarm with fireman - by which time the cat had managed to scramble onto a nearby rooftop.
When firemen tried to free the pet from the roof they discovered Fleck had vanished and assumed she had made her own way to safety.
But a short while later they were called back again when locals realised the cat had got into the ventilation system of the block of flats.
Fire Brigade spokesman Mike Filzen said: "We could hear her calling and getting deeper and deeper into the building all the time. Eventually she seemed to get finally stuck in a bathroom in one of the flats so we resorted to a hammer and chisel to make a hole in the wall, and then used a linen basket to catch her and bring her to safety."
Fleck was then reunited with her owner Katarina Schell, 36, who also agreed to pay a builder to fix the hole in the wall of the bathroom.
How Boris Becker Was Brougt Low by Cheap TV stunt
Three-time Wimbledon tennis ace Boris Becker has been accused of making himself into a laughing stock by taking part in a cheap publicity stunt this weekend to promote his new book "Life Is Not a Game". The stunt included having a giant bow with two fly swats strapped to his head to play table tennis.
GRIN AND BEAR IT - Brown Bears At The Dentist
With toothache in choppers this size, these brown bears at a German wildlife park had every right to be a bit grizzly.
FORK THAT - Worker turns Fork Lift Into Jousting Lance
German police are investigating after a hyper market worker turned his forklift truck into a jousting device and attempted to spear a fellow worker after a row.
DIRTY THIRTY - Fake Euro Note Warning By Cops
A German corner shop owner saw some of his profits go up in smoke after he accepted payment for a pack of cigarettes with this non-existent 30 Euro note.
MURDER MYSTERY: Did Killer Confess in Novel?
Fugitive Norbert Wieland, 66, has been on the run since his girlfriend Bettina Polzer's body was found at her apartment in Furstenfeldbruck, Germany.
WHITE BLAM MAN - Brit Cheats Death By Seconds in Crane Smash
A British white van man cheated death by seconds in Germany when a falling 130 crane arm cut his truck in half.
UNTRUCKY BREAK: Thief Facing Justice
This smug looking truck thief will soon be facing justice - after speed cameras caught him fleeing the scene in Sarstedt, Germany.
NAZI SHOCK: Death Camp Victims Buried Beside SS Officers
Nazi death camp victims were secretly buried beside SS officers at a German World War II cemetery, outraged historians have revealed.
PICNIC BASKET BABY MURDERED - Baby abandoned in River Danube
A mother whose newborn baby boy was found dead in a picnic hamper with his throat cut is being quizzed by police in Regensburg, Germany.
WE ARE NOT EMU-SED - 7 Police Cars Chase Emu
Heavy handed cops gunned down a six foot tall emu after it escaped from an enclosure in Heimfeld, Germany.
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