This newspaper is a time machine, locked in around the time of two World Wars, one World Cup and a lost age when it was permissible to poke fun at Germans.
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13. 10. 12. - 19:00
Austrian police are hunting a refugee family from Syria who dumped one of their children at the train station in Vienna after discovering that they didn't have enough money to buy all three of their children a ticket for the final part of their journey to Berlin.
The family of five had reportedly paid smugglers €16,000 to get them through Afghanistan and Serbia to Berlin, but ended up being dumped in Vienna and told to take a train for the last leg of the journey.
But when they enquired about its they found they didn't have enough money to pay for everyone – and so carried on but left the 12-year-old behind.
The distressed youngster was discovered by police who found that he was without any paperwork and took him to the local social services office.
Spokesman Walter Ceipek said: "It may not have been as coldhearted as it seems – it is well known that Vienna has an extremely efficient youth protection office and that the youngster would have been in good hands as soon as he was handed over.
"But nevertheless it was extremely distressing for the young boy to be abandoned – we have managed to identify a relative of his who lives in Vienna was confirmed with the boys but we have so far failed to trace the parents who would believe in Berlin. The relative who is a distant uncle is not prepared to look after the boy."
How Boris Becker Was Brougt Low by Cheap TV stunt
Three-time Wimbledon tennis ace Boris Becker has been accused of making himself into a laughing stock by taking part in a cheap publicity stunt this weekend to promote his new book "Life Is Not a Game". The stunt included having a giant bow with two fly swats strapped to his head to play table tennis.
GRIN AND BEAR IT - Brown Bears At The Dentist
With toothache in choppers this size, these brown bears at a German wildlife park had every right to be a bit grizzly.
FORK THAT - Worker turns Fork Lift Into Jousting Lance
German police are investigating after a hyper market worker turned his forklift truck into a jousting device and attempted to spear a fellow worker after a row.
DIRTY THIRTY - Fake Euro Note Warning By Cops
A German corner shop owner saw some of his profits go up in smoke after he accepted payment for a pack of cigarettes with this non-existent 30 Euro note.
MURDER MYSTERY: Did Killer Confess in Novel?
Fugitive Norbert Wieland, 66, has been on the run since his girlfriend Bettina Polzer's body was found at her apartment in Furstenfeldbruck, Germany.
WHITE BLAM MAN - Brit Cheats Death By Seconds in Crane Smash
A British white van man cheated death by seconds in Germany when a falling 130 crane arm cut his truck in half.
UNTRUCKY BREAK: Thief Facing Justice
This smug looking truck thief will soon be facing justice - after speed cameras caught him fleeing the scene in Sarstedt, Germany.
NAZI SHOCK: Death Camp Victims Buried Beside SS Officers
Nazi death camp victims were secretly buried beside SS officers at a German World War II cemetery, outraged historians have revealed.
PICNIC BASKET BABY MURDERED - Baby abandoned in River Danube
A mother whose newborn baby boy was found dead in a picnic hamper with his throat cut is being quizzed by police in Regensburg, Germany.
WE ARE NOT EMU-SED - 7 Police Cars Chase Emu
Heavy handed cops gunned down a six foot tall emu after it escaped from an enclosure in Heimfeld, Germany.
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